i am fat. i must not eat.

i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am fat. i must not eat. i am faaatttttt. i willllll nottt eat!!!
i typed that. no copy and paste. i know i didn't type much but today i am in a new mindset after slipping into an old pair of jeans i had. hmmm did i just say slipping? aheemm.. what i really meant was struggling. pushing. pulling. and then i looked in the mirror. big fat love handles. and THEN, my sister walks in to straighten her hair. oh my god. i thought she wasn't that skinny, but... in her skinny jeans she has model thin legs. it put me in such a bad mood. and now i am comepletely determined to be thin. i guess it never really occured to me that i was that fat until i put on some tighter fitting clothes (it's summer so i have just been wearing athletic shorts and big tees). i am huge!

i think that's all that i have to say. although it seems like if i wake up and blog in the morning it seems so set me up for a whole day. i really love all of your comments and thank you sooo much for your help. i look forward to reading what you have posted this lovely morning during which i feel exceptionally piggish :( ugh. i'm sorry also if all of my post have been sounding like complete failures but i know this will be one of the last few.tomorrows post i will have fasted for one day!! second fasting a full day in my whole life!! wooohooo!

PICs: fashiontoast.com - these girls are so lucky to have legs that thin. and look at what tori spelling is eating! i mean seriously?! but she's thin. unlike moi... but i will!