fasting day 1

i like someone. and they will never, i repeat-NEVER, like me back unless I lose at least 20 lbs. I will be skinny so I am going to fast for about three days. I keep reminding myself that there are starving children in africa, so when I c&s, I am being the most selfish person in the whole entire world. i have become accustomed to this feeling of hunger and i almost enjoy it. it feels sooo much better than being so full that you just can't move. i also keep reminding myself of him and how ripped he is and how i am not and how i will work out for a bare minimum of 30 mins a day. I will have abs. not man-abs, female-firmness. i decided to set an actual goal date of april 30th, a thursday, to be the date that I WILL WEIGH 130LBS at least that much, I wil lose 30lbs. I don't care what people say about starving yourself will just make you lose water weight, if that were true then how come anorexic people are so skinny huh?

i also have to come up with a safe fasting plan. I mean, the hardest part is breaking the fast, right? i will not get sidetracked, i will just drink diet sodas and water, so it will be a water fast today. i think that because it is the weekend I should be able to break the fast on tuesday night, and only with a cut up apple, and water so that I am full of water and won't overeat.

this is the way it's going to be honey, this is the way it's going to be for a long time...