every other day.

hey again. sorry this blog has become an every other day posted blog... i haven't really been able to get to my computer lately. but i'm still the same, my weight hasn't moved one ounce. i guess that's a good thing, but on the other hand, i'm still 150... so that's not good either. i really need to get back on track. i'm almost doubting my mind now. i wish i could beat some food sense into my head with a stick so that i wouldn't eat today. but you know what, i may have already had a bowl of cereal and two potato chips but... i can start NOW. i think cereal is enough for one day. ok... just water all the way. i have to drink at least one glass every hour.

thanks again for the support gals. also i really need ot start blogging daily again because that really seems to keep me on track. i think that i have been so afraid of fat these few weeks that i am too scared to weight myself. its like if i don't weigh then... its like i can eat whatever i want. ok another new rule... weigh more than 3 times a day. spread it out too (this is me talking to myself haha)... that way (even though its water weight) it keeps telling me that hell no you aren't gonna weigh 150 at the start of school - you will weigh at least 140. only ten pounds. thats pretty much more than doable if you ask me.

PIC: from lookbook once again. i get almost all of my thinspo from there :) wish me luck! and i wish all of you even more luck in your fasting expeditions.

let myself go.

oh my god. i have really let myself go. i am so afraid to look at the scale right now. i know its back up to 150. i was doing so well too. i don't have that much to say right now, except that i just got back from my friend's 4th party and i ate cake. i ate cake! and half a hot dog and rolos. its soo easy to get caught up in eating when all of your friends are and then they stare at you and wonder why you aren't eating anything. i hate myself. i feel like the fattest pig ever.

also, my sister decided to wear a tank today and she looks soooo skinny. i am so jealous of her. and she is now even a little bit taller than me, even though she is younger. ugg. she has everything. and my father always makes stupid jokes about how i eat too much (even though i'm not really eating i'm c&s'ing it). ugg i really feel fat just writing this. i know how horrible it feels to be full. i'm sorry i'm so down girls, i just hope i can not eat anything from now on...

water... water everywhere

yesterday was one of my good restriction days, although i hate when i try to fast and it turns into restriction. it makes me feel like i have no control. anyway, i ate fewer than 300 cals yesterday even with a small bowl of sherbet that my mother forced me to eat. i can now say that i am under 150. even if i did weigh in the morning, but that's when i always weigh myself.

i even found this magic jump rope workout (i love my jump rope and it magically burns 10 cals a minute) on fitness magazine that will burn 100 cals in 10 minutes!!! and its soo hard but i did it and i plan on doing it more than once per day. i'm thinking like at lease 4 times or everytime i get the urge to eat.

also my family had to go to some chinese buffet yesterday (what is it with them and chinese??!!) and there was so much food. so i just thought of it as good practice for when i fast and restrict. i sat back and watched the table while everyone else stuffed their faces and i chugged about 3 glasses of water in less than 3 minutes (including thie time it took for the waitress to refill it). i was so full and all i could eat where some mini mushrooms and broccoli. I was very proud of myself, until i let myself have a whol spring roll. oh well, i guess it could have been an EGG roll.

new reverse thinso web guys... this is why you're fat.
no no!! i didn't call you fat, i mean that's the name of the blog. i don't know about you but most of the food they post on here makes me sick and not want to eat a burger ever again. i hope it works for you all and doesn't cause a relapse. WARNING - VERY UNHEALTHY FOOD IMAGES CONTAINED IN BLOG... VIEW AT YOUR OWN RISK...

yes i think all that food is disgusting. but anyway, thats all i have to say. oh and i lost another pound! probably water weight. but i can't wait until i can fast again.

P.S. thanks everyone for all the fasting info, especially eva!!

peace ☮ & thin ♥

Hey gals, this is just a thinspo post, i was getting anxious/bored/hungry so i had to hold myself back. hope it helps more than just me! and i'll make another post about yesterday and my day a little later today, i just felt like posting thinspo. stay thin!

lookbook.nu

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everything is o.k. (maybe)

well yesterday didn't go so well. and i feel like i failed ya'll because you think i'm so in control! i started to reread some of my other posts and yeah it seems like that but i am horrible at keeping track. also it seems that the only thing i can eat/drink for breakfast is tea - otherwise i start binging the rest of the day. it's like, if i only drink tea, it sets me up well for the remainder of the day.

water fast today. i gained .6 of a pound and i was literally freaking. i even weighed in the morning! ugg... i am soooo fat. i am also hoping that when i lose the rest of this weight my cup size will shrink too (i'm a C) i have this old bra from 3 years ago (B-cup) and i can't wait until i can fit into it.

i am somewhat satisfied with my eating right now because my stomach is growling and empty. well time to get some more tea. see you later honeys and enjoy the thinspo :)

P.S. if any of you girls have any fasting tips... PLEASE LET ME KNOW!!! i am pretty good at everything ana but fasting is my weakness! anything to keep your mind off food, liquid fasts, anything would help. please comment. thanks so much, you all keep me going every morning.

1st PIC: The Satorialist

anne valerie hash fall 2008 couture

Numero Tokyo March 09 - photo credit: tfs

Numero Tokyo March 09 - photo credit: tfs

Le Flassh